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I have a lump in my throat. Probably because I just went through the photos from ‘that time’ to find one for this post. The wheelchair is gone, as are the crutches and the walker and the cane…but the memories aren’t. Of the time I sat on the ground positive that I would puke or pass out while trying to force myself to tell the paramedics that “I am pregnant.” Secretly not wanting to, afraid to see the alarm that I feel reflected  in their faces. When I do, he takes pause and says into a walkie, “Scratch that, we have three patients…not two.”

I write not for sympathy, or pity or effect, but to remember and to tell you, since you’ve so often asked in your kind notes and e mails that have certainly not gone unnoticed. Yes, my baby is here and he is safe and healthy. Yes, I can walk and fetch my own water from downstairs as I silently (and often times not so silently) wished to do for a full year as I lay in my bed. I sometimes still get a pang when I see a mother strolling her newborn and remember how I never even carried my second and last child until he was well over six months old. How I never stood over his carriage, proudly telling strangers his name and age as he slept soundly, like only a newborn can. I remember these things in a way that no one else does, and silently mourn them – not often – just sometimes.

Don’t be mistaken; I am as grateful as a person can be, but there are…things. I wonder who Z would be now had I been able to be his primary caregiver for all of that time – a full third of his life at that point.  I think about the time that my mother told me not to let him hear me cry in pain, because it would scare him. And how during physical therapy when I tried to walk for the first time, my brain knew what to do but no matter how hard I tried, I couldn’t make my body follow suit. About the first time I ventured out alone on crutches (against the urging of my husband and father) to ‘my’ Marshall’s to prove to myself that I could; where I promptly fell, embarrassed and afraid once again as I pretended to be okay when a stranger inquired, only to drive back home, shaken and sore.

I write because you have asked, “How did you get through it?” and I’d love to be able to say, “because I am brave and strong and fearless.” Truth be told, I had no other choice. I had babies both in and outside of me, which changes things. I had a husband that proved to be a bigger person than I ever could have imagined. I had a strong marriage to begin with, that transformed into something completely different, in the best of all possible ways.

I can tell you about the day that I fell, that I shattered the tibia and fibula in my left leg, on my father’s birthday, after seeing my unborn son’s heartbeat on a sonogram for the first time. That they loaded me into an ambulance, without drugs, to the words “It’s probably just a sprain” and sent me en route to one of the scariest hospitals I can think of. That I lay on a gurney for close to twelve hours, until it was finally my turn for surgery and that I asked the surgical assistant to hold my hand. That my husband absentmindedly voted for American Idol from his cell phone, because he could think of nothing else to do. That I won’t ever run again in my lifetime. I can tell you all of it, but it will never be quite like I remember. And maybe that’s a good thing.

Kim Noorda in Christian Dior Fall 2010 Couture (Photo Credit: Monica Feudi/GoRunway.com via Style.com)

Back by popular demand, the talented (and hysterical) Krista Schrock has been generous enough to recreate another beautiful room, based upon this jaw-dropping Christian Dior gown. Once again, I chose several outfits from which Krista make the final selection, only this time I decided to amp it up from Ready-To-Wear to a little couture, because seriously? Who doesn’t need more couture in their life? Don’t answer that.

(Details, pricing and where to buy: CB2 ‘Parlour’ Sofa, West Elm ‘Martini’ Side Table in Persimmon, Neenas ‘Studio Balustrade Candle’ Floor Lamp in French Wax, Anthropologie ‘Sweet As Honey’ Rug, Plunder Room Antiques Green & Yellow Needlepoint Pillow, Walmart Banana Fish Moda Multi-Stripe Decorative Pillow, Hugo Guinness 4 Print Botanical Silouette Set, Hugo Guinness Original Artwork)

Interior designer Krista Schrock has earned a reputation amongst entertainment industry professionals and celebrities as a designer who understands the need to create a fantastic space; one that is truly reflective of individual personalities. She is currently living and working in Los Angeles, and can be reached through her website at www.kristaschrock.com.

When you’ve been friends for thirty years, it doesn’t matter how hot it is…

…especially when there is shoe shopping involved.

Although when we were twelve, we might not have guessed that some would look like this…

…and even though she thinks I look like Joan Collins in my Pucci sun hat, I am never better than when we are together.

…because who wouldn’t wanted to hit the desert mid-week in the dead of July? Have an amazing week, and I’ll see you Monday!

Malgosia Bela (ELITE) Photo: Courtesy of Givenchy via Style.com

Natasha Poly (WOMEN) Photo: Courtesy of Givenchy via Style.com

Joan Smalls (IMG) Photo: Courtesy of Givenchy via Style.com

Daphne Groeneveld (WOMEN) Photo: Courtesy of Givenchy via Style.com

Mariacarla Boscono (VIVA) Photo: Courtesy of Givenchy via Style.com

Insane. Just insane. Truly inspiring.

I know I’m rushing you, but fall is right around the corner even if you can’t feel it. How much are you going to wish you had scooped up this ensemble, for a mere hundred and seventy-five bucks – including shoes – come September? Food for thought.

I recently had the pleasure of meeting Ximena Valero, an L.A. based fashion designer, whose signature is a convertible piece wearable in a myriad of ways. While there are other brands that offer the same idea, Valero’s is the first I’ve actually seen up close and tried on. In fact, she gifted me one of her ‘OMG’ dresses, and I’m very excited to wear it! I’ve played around with it, but haven’t had a chance to actually wear it out since it’s really long – built for leggy models, I guess. So until I can find a pair of suitable platforms, I’ll have to settle for studying this video that demonstrates all the different ways to wear the dress – fun!

Maya Meinert is the editor of ShopEatSleep.com. She covers retail, dining and hospitality in Los Angeles, as well as contributing her own personal picks. She was most recently the Marketplace reporter at The Los Angeles Business Journal, and has contributed to The Los Angeles Daily Journal, Santa Monica Daily Press, Los Angeles magazine and Giant Robot magazine. Maya can be contacted at shopeatsleepblog@gmail.com.

The beautiful and talented Rebecca Woolf of Girl's Gone Child

I have a secret. A dirty one. (*deep breath*) Imnotcrazyaboutreadingblogs. I know this seems grossly counter-intuitive since I freaking write one, but it has to be really unique-in-a-way-I-can’t-put-my-finger-on in order to draw me in and hold my attention. And then I found Girl’s Gone Child.

I felt immediately connected to not only Rebecca’s life experiences and parenting views, but above all else, to her voice. She is positively fearless and speaks with brutal honesty, making no apologies for who she is, her choices, views or shortcomings. I identify with her on a level of I’m-facing-this-thing-called-life-and-parenting-with-all-its-imperfections, and the fact that – get ready – she embraces them. Inspiring stuff. It could be because she’s roughly a decade younger (shut it) than I am, and reminds me to find lightness and beauty in all that happens, regardless of the shit storm it can often be – for that I am most grateful. Not to mention she has a kick-ass sense of non-mommy style for both herself and her kids…

LASM: Allow me to start by saying that I adore your blog -  you remind so much of my younger self (minus the kids), even though in my brain I like to pretend we’re the same age. Moving on. What fashion state-of-mind are you currently in?

RW: Quirky bohemian? Off-duty ballerina? California urbanite? Paris, Summer of ’69? High maintenance hippie? Etc, etc? I have a very late 60′s, early 70′s aesthetic as far as fashion goes. I was born a decade after my time, apparently. I love skinny jeans with fat tees, leggings paired with chunky tunics and slouchy boots. And hats. I love me some head-gear. My dream is to someday open a vintage hat store. Sigh.

LASM: Who or what do you find inspires your fashion sense?

Rebecca and her daughter, Fable.

(Click to Polyvore for details, pricing and where to buy.)